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Author: Kasper Hauser
Publisher: Ten Speed Press
ISBN: 1607744252
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 130
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Book Description
Move over Harvard, Stanford, and Wharton--there's a new top-ranking MBA program in town! With the Kasper Hauser Continuing Education Academy, all it takes is a few minutes and a roll of bathroom tissue to earn a fully-accredited executive business degree. For the hundreds of millions of Americans who are looking for better, more successful, and more fulfilling lives--but don't have the time and money to invest in a full-on graduate degree--comes this revolutionary new system that turns crap into gold! With Earn Your MBA on the Toilet, the Kasper Hauser Continuing Education Academy offers readers a complete business education, on subjects ranging from Accounting to Widgets to Business Ethics to Ethical Pickles. Why spend $100,000 and two years on an MBA when you can simply read this book? Written for the busy professional, the unemployed CEO, or the motivated alcoholic, this incredible course condenses thousands of hours of business wisdom into a 72-minute crash course, chunked into 3-minute "jam sessions." After a mere 8 trips to the toilet, readers will be able to hold their own with a finance professor at a cocktail party; after 15, they will be qualified to work as a management consultant for a Bass Pro shop; and by the end they will have a certificate of completion that is definitely, literally an MBA degree on par with the big guys, basically.
Author: Kasper Hauser
Publisher: Ten Speed Press
ISBN: 1607744252
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 130
Get Book
Book Description
Move over Harvard, Stanford, and Wharton--there's a new top-ranking MBA program in town! With the Kasper Hauser Continuing Education Academy, all it takes is a few minutes and a roll of bathroom tissue to earn a fully-accredited executive business degree. For the hundreds of millions of Americans who are looking for better, more successful, and more fulfilling lives--but don't have the time and money to invest in a full-on graduate degree--comes this revolutionary new system that turns crap into gold! With Earn Your MBA on the Toilet, the Kasper Hauser Continuing Education Academy offers readers a complete business education, on subjects ranging from Accounting to Widgets to Business Ethics to Ethical Pickles. Why spend $100,000 and two years on an MBA when you can simply read this book? Written for the busy professional, the unemployed CEO, or the motivated alcoholic, this incredible course condenses thousands of hours of business wisdom into a 72-minute crash course, chunked into 3-minute "jam sessions." After a mere 8 trips to the toilet, readers will be able to hold their own with a finance professor at a cocktail party; after 15, they will be qualified to work as a management consultant for a Bass Pro shop; and by the end they will have a certificate of completion that is definitely, literally an MBA degree on par with the big guys, basically.
Author: Dan Klein
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 0312380917
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 138
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Book Description
You are cordially invited to celebrate A Parody of The New York Times Wedding Announcements by Kasper Hauser Along with fully illustrated guides to: Wedding-night sex, Honeymoon hot spots, Formalwear malfunctions, and much, much more. At four o'clock in the Afternoon. Or is it three o'clock? Didn't you bring the invitation? Huh? Where the hell is the turnoff? Back there. I think I saw a paper plate and some balloons. What's wrong? I just need to eat something. I'm fine. Remind me how we know these people? "In this collection, Kasper Hauser reminds us that a wedding announcement is a window into the most goofball daydream a couple can have about itself.... These are not parodies, but little human stories, full of want and hope, even when they involve falconry." ---from the foreword by John Hodgman
Author: Kasper Hauser
Publisher: Little, Brown
ISBN: 0316078840
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 140
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Book Description
When Obama stated that if elected, he would keep his Blackberry, debate echoed through Washington and among the ranks of the Secret Service. What would it be like to have a president who could Twitter, send text messages, and navigate the web with ease? What would it be like to receive a text message from inside the Oval Office and, most importantly, what would it say? Now, for the first time, We The People are privy to our new leader's epistolary back-and-forths on his wily hand-held device. We're about to discover that his emails (and the replies, from his wife and daughters, Biden, Palen, Rush, Hannity, the new first puppy, and even Bush) are so tuned in to the language of electronic correspondence they come hilariously close to the brink of legibility. This giftable, imagined glimpse into Obama's beloved Blackberry traverses the mundane and momentous contours of the Commander in Chief's life, from security briefings to spam, basketball practice to domestic bliss, and the panic of oops-I-hit-reply-all, to, of course, the trauma of dealing with the First Mother In Law. To wit: BidenMyTime: Hey U, whatcha doin? BARACKO: M rly busy BidenMyTime: Right :( Can I lv at 4:45?
Author: Robert Baedeker
Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin
ISBN: 1466841087
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 128
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Book Description
The funniest catalog in America. Guaranteed. Let award-winning comedy troupe Kasper Hauser transport you into the sublime universe that is SkyMaul, where Banana-ganizers and Reality-Canceling Headphones coexist with Crack Pipe Chess Sets and Llamacycles. More than just a catalog parody, SkyMaul explodes with razor-sharp wit, boundless creativity, and a keen eye for the absurd. This smart, edgy satire will earn your laughter again and again.
Author: Deborah Dumaine
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 0307493431
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 306
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Book Description
The Write to the Top process helps you write clear, reader-centered documents that drive action and get results. Productivity—it’s vital to corporate and personal success. Yet business people spend countless hours deciphering vague and rambling written messages. The results: information overload, sluggish operations, delayed decisions, and plummeting morale. Quality—when you receive a business document, e-mail, letter, report, or proposal, do you immediately know what it’s about? Do you know what you’re supposed to do about it? When you send messages, do your readers act on them? They quickly will, if you use the proven Write to the Top process. Put The Six Steps to Reader-Centered Writing® to work to help you • sell your ideas or services more effectively • write up to twice as fast and save time for your busy readers, too • break through writer’s block • target your readers’ needs • demonstrate your leadership in writing • design documents for visual impact and easier navigation • improve your ability to think strategically, propose solutions, and speed up decision making
Author: Josh Richman
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 9780811857826
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 102
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Book Description
"With universal appeal (everyone poops, after all), this witty, illustrated description of over two dozen dookies (each with a medical explanation written by a doctor) details what one can learn about health and well-being by studying what's in the bowl. A floater? It's probably due to a buildup of gas. Now think back on last night's dinner, a burrito perhaps? . . .All the greatest hits are here: The Log Jam, The Glass Shard, The Deja Poo, The Hanging Chad ... the list goes on. Sidebars, trivia, over 60 euphemisms for number 2, and unusual case histories all make this the ultimate bathroom reader. Who knew you could learn so much from your poo?"--Publisher website (October 2007)
Author: Paul Simpson
Publisher: Titan Books
ISBN: 9781840237955
Category : Performing Arts
Languages : en
Pages : 180
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Book Description
Smallville, the hit series which follows the adventures of a teenaged Clark Kent and his friends - including Lana Lang and a certain Lex Luthor - is simply one of the hottest shows on TV. This authorized companion tells you everything you could possibly need to know about season one, and is packed with exclusive interviews, unseen photos, behind-the-scenes secrets and a complete episode guide. Also included are insights into the world of Smallville, with excerpts from the town and high school newspapers, the Smallville Ledger and the Smallville Torch!
Author: Alison Green
Publisher: Ballantine Books
ISBN: 0399181814
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 306
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Book Description
From the creator of the popular website Ask a Manager and New York’s work-advice columnist comes a witty, practical guide to 200 difficult professional conversations—featuring all-new advice! There’s a reason Alison Green has been called “the Dear Abby of the work world.” Ten years as a workplace-advice columnist have taught her that people avoid awkward conversations in the office because they simply don’t know what to say. Thankfully, Green does—and in this incredibly helpful book, she tackles the tough discussions you may need to have during your career. You’ll learn what to say when • coworkers push their work on you—then take credit for it • you accidentally trash-talk someone in an email then hit “reply all” • you’re being micromanaged—or not being managed at all • you catch a colleague in a lie • your boss seems unhappy with your work • your cubemate’s loud speakerphone is making you homicidal • you got drunk at the holiday party Praise for Ask a Manager “A must-read for anyone who works . . . [Alison Green’s] advice boils down to the idea that you should be professional (even when others are not) and that communicating in a straightforward manner with candor and kindness will get you far, no matter where you work.”—Booklist (starred review) “The author’s friendly, warm, no-nonsense writing is a pleasure to read, and her advice can be widely applied to relationships in all areas of readers’ lives. Ideal for anyone new to the job market or new to management, or anyone hoping to improve their work experience.”—Library Journal (starred review) “I am a huge fan of Alison Green’s Ask a Manager column. This book is even better. It teaches us how to deal with many of the most vexing big and little problems in our workplaces—and to do so with grace, confidence, and a sense of humor.”—Robert Sutton, Stanford professor and author of The No Asshole Rule and The Asshole Survival Guide “Ask a Manager is the ultimate playbook for navigating the traditional workforce in a diplomatic but firm way.”—Erin Lowry, author of Broke Millennial: Stop Scraping By and Get Your Financial Life Together
Author: Fredrik deBoer
Publisher: All Points Books
ISBN: 1250200385
Category : Education
Languages : en
Pages : 272
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Book Description
Named one of Vulture’s Top 10 Best Books of 2020! Leftist firebrand Fredrik deBoer exposes the lie at the heart of our educational system and demands top-to-bottom reform. Everyone agrees that education is the key to creating a more just and equal world, and that our schools are broken and failing. Proposed reforms variously target incompetent teachers, corrupt union practices, or outdated curricula, but no one acknowledges a scientifically-proven fact that we all understand intuitively: Academic potential varies between individuals, and cannot be dramatically improved. In The Cult of Smart, educator and outspoken leftist Fredrik deBoer exposes this omission as the central flaw of our entire society, which has created and perpetuated an unjust class structure based on intellectual ability. Since cognitive talent varies from person to person, our education system can never create equal opportunity for all. Instead, it teaches our children that hierarchy and competition are natural, and that human value should be based on intelligence. These ideas are counter to everything that the left believes, but until they acknowledge the existence of individual cognitive differences, progressives remain complicit in keeping the status quo in place. This passionate, voice-driven manifesto demands that we embrace a new goal for education: equality of outcomes. We must create a world that has a place for everyone, not just the academically talented. But we’ll never achieve this dream until the Cult of Smart is destroyed.
Author: Jim F. Kukral
Publisher: John Wiley & Sons
ISBN: 0470880686
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 306
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Book Description
Drive Web traffic and take your business into the future In todays social Web marketplace, attention equals revenue. When you direct more attention online to your brand or business, you drive more long-term revenue. Regardless of who you are or how small your business is, you can have a huge impact using free Internet tools...provided you understand and correctly apply the latest techniques. Attention! gives you an educational and motivational guide to using social media to market your brand or business online. In three parts, you'll discover everything you need to know to get off the ground and thrive in the social mediasphere, including The tools, techniques and tricks to get attention online and turn that attention into profit The theory behind the importance of making your mark on the Internet How other businesses and individuals made money from online marketing Whether you're just starting your business, just moving it online, or already established and looking to take your business to the next level, Attention! is the key to success.
