Beyond Bullying

Beyond Bullying PDF Author: Jonathan Fast
Publisher: Oxford University Press, USA
ISBN: 0199383642
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 265

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Book Description
In this ambitious new work, Dr. Jonathan Fast proposes a new way of understanding the bullying experience (of the bully, the bullied, and the bystander), via the lens of shame. Beyond Bullying posits that shame is the powerful emotion that is often at the heart of many of the dynamics classified as bullying. Shame is a common human emotion for which Fast establishes a hierarchy of reactions. The following is an example of "healthy shame": when 5-year-old Sam finger-paints on his plate with his mashed potatoes, his mother says "you won't be allowed to eat at the grownup table until you stop sticking your fingers in your food." The shame in this scenario is healthy because it encourages Sam to master skills that will make him more autonomous and socially appealing, compared to "toxic shame" that damages one's self-concept by critiquing what one is rather than what one does. The distinction can be seen in the example of a parent whose child constantly forgets to complete her homework. The parent who says "your mother and I expect you to study and get good grades" is employing healthy shame, while the parent who shouts in frustration and anger "you're so lazy! You'll never amount to anything!" is administering a dose of toxic shame, directed at his daughter's self-concept rather than that act of neglecting her homework. "Weaponized Shame," which forms the core focus of this book, is the intentional use of those attacks on another person's self-concept for the purpose of inflicting emotional and psychological harm. The premise of the book is that all bullying involves "weaponized shame." Through the use of Shame Maps, simple iconographic diagrams similar to the genograms used by family therapists, Dr. Fast visually represents the overlapping shame dynamics in play in many common interactions, emphasizing the use of weaponized shame in bullying situations. The Shame Maps provide a useful tool for parents, teachers, therapists, school mental-health professionals, and others to use when discussing bullying with children, adolescents, and other adults. Fast traces different nuances of shame dynamics through several common types of bullying, highlighting LGBTQ, gender, and race among other bases for bullying actions, before extending the analysis to terminal acts of violence including school shootings, terrorism, homicide, and suicide. The book will both give readers concrete suggestions for healthy ways to discharge shame and equip them with techniques to help diffuse potentially harmful situations before they lead to dangerous extremes. The author is developing an interactive companion website to the book that will allow visitors to create personal shame maps based on their own scenario, to help readers employ this tool in real-world situations.

Beyond Bullying

Beyond Bullying PDF Author: Jonathan Fast
Publisher: Oxford University Press, USA
ISBN: 0199383642
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 265

Get Book

Book Description
In this ambitious new work, Dr. Jonathan Fast proposes a new way of understanding the bullying experience (of the bully, the bullied, and the bystander), via the lens of shame. Beyond Bullying posits that shame is the powerful emotion that is often at the heart of many of the dynamics classified as bullying. Shame is a common human emotion for which Fast establishes a hierarchy of reactions. The following is an example of "healthy shame": when 5-year-old Sam finger-paints on his plate with his mashed potatoes, his mother says "you won't be allowed to eat at the grownup table until you stop sticking your fingers in your food." The shame in this scenario is healthy because it encourages Sam to master skills that will make him more autonomous and socially appealing, compared to "toxic shame" that damages one's self-concept by critiquing what one is rather than what one does. The distinction can be seen in the example of a parent whose child constantly forgets to complete her homework. The parent who says "your mother and I expect you to study and get good grades" is employing healthy shame, while the parent who shouts in frustration and anger "you're so lazy! You'll never amount to anything!" is administering a dose of toxic shame, directed at his daughter's self-concept rather than that act of neglecting her homework. "Weaponized Shame," which forms the core focus of this book, is the intentional use of those attacks on another person's self-concept for the purpose of inflicting emotional and psychological harm. The premise of the book is that all bullying involves "weaponized shame." Through the use of Shame Maps, simple iconographic diagrams similar to the genograms used by family therapists, Dr. Fast visually represents the overlapping shame dynamics in play in many common interactions, emphasizing the use of weaponized shame in bullying situations. The Shame Maps provide a useful tool for parents, teachers, therapists, school mental-health professionals, and others to use when discussing bullying with children, adolescents, and other adults. Fast traces different nuances of shame dynamics through several common types of bullying, highlighting LGBTQ, gender, and race among other bases for bullying actions, before extending the analysis to terminal acts of violence including school shootings, terrorism, homicide, and suicide. The book will both give readers concrete suggestions for healthy ways to discharge shame and equip them with techniques to help diffuse potentially harmful situations before they lead to dangerous extremes. The author is developing an interactive companion website to the book that will allow visitors to create personal shame maps based on their own scenario, to help readers employ this tool in real-world situations.

Breaking the Cycle of Shame

Breaking the Cycle of Shame PDF Author: Gregg Gulledge
Publisher: Xulon Press
ISBN: 1606475258
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 250

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Book Description
Learn how: ?To analyze the system that has shaped your problem. ?To see sorrow, grief and mourning correctly. ?To pass on an inheritance to your children in dealing with grief issues. ?Acquire the keys to restore completeness in an environment of safety. ?To align your borders with pleasant stones. ?Your seed can possess the gates of your enemies. ?To dissolve the "dirty birds" of grief. ?To call an exceeding great army together. ?To change your atmosphere. ?To defeat supernatural sorrow and grief in your life. ?God measures. ?To take care of your spiritual bullies. ?And who is King over all the children of pride. ?Sorrow carves on you. ?Sorrow leads you to Grief. ?Grief leads you to Mourning. ?Sorrow, grief and mourning are the backbone of the cycle of shame. ?And what promises are yours concerning sorrow, grief and mourning. ?Who is leviathan? Gregg and Karren Gulledge entered into the ministry in 1967 and after a series of situations they left the ministry with a bitterly disillusioned view about the "church." After years of wandering about they were reunited with their lost love, Jesus. Now the journey of love continues as the Lord has restored them and uses them to testify of what the Word can do for God's people. Gregg and Karren are called repairers of breaches and restorers of paths to dwell in for the days ahead through their gifted ministry that breaks barrenness and restores fruitfulness to the people of God. Gregg and Karren have been used by the Lord to turn sorrow, grief and mourning into joy and gladness by changing the atmosphere through the revelation on how to break the cycle of being dry, disappointed, confused and ashamed.

Breaking the Cycle

Breaking the Cycle PDF Author: George Collins
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
ISBN: 1608820858
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 224

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Book Description
Anyone who has struggled with sex addiction knows that living with constant sexual compulsions can be extremely difficult. But summoning the courage to find help for this condition can be even more of a challenge. If addictions to pornography, strip clubs, massage parlors, prostitutes, phone sex, or chat rooms have made you feel trapped, this book can help you find a way to break free. Written by a former sex addict who specializes in counseling people who suffer from sexually compulsive behavior, Breaking the Cycle presents a step-by-step plan to enjoying a life of productivity and purpose. You can free yourself from the powerful, compulsive urges that may have damaged your career, finances, or relationships with friends and family. The exercises in this book will show you how to regain control of your life and build meaningful intimate connections with others.

Healing the Shame that Binds You

Healing the Shame that Binds You PDF Author: John Bradshaw
Publisher: Health Communications, Inc.
ISBN: 0757303234
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 338

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Book Description
This classic book, written 17 years ago but still selling more than 13,000 copies every year, has been completely updated and expanded by the author. "I used to drink," writes John Bradshaw,"to solve the problems caused by drinking. The more I drank to relieve my shame-based loneliness and hurt, the more I felt ashamed." Shame is the motivator behind our toxic behaviors: the compulsion, co-dependency, addiction and drive to superachieve that breaks down the family and destroys personal lives. This book has helped millions identify their personal shame, understand the underlying reasons for it, address these root causes and release themselves from the shame that binds them to their past failures.

I Don't Want to Talk About It

I Don't Want to Talk About It PDF Author: Terrence Real
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0684865394
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 390

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Book Description
A bestseller for over 20 years, I Don’t Want to Talk About It is a groundbreaking and hopeful guide to understanding and destigmatizing male depression, essential not only for men who may be suffering but for the people who love them. Twenty years of experience treating men and their families has convinced psychotherapist Terrence Real that depression is a silent epidemic in men—that men hide their condition from family, friends, and themselves to avoid the stigma of depression’s “un-manliness.” Problems that we think of as typically male—difficulty with intimacy, workaholism, alcoholism, abusive behavior, and rage—are really attempts to escape depression. And these escape attempts only hurt the people men love and pass their condition on to their children. This groundbreaking book is the “pathway out of darkness” that these men and their families seek. Real reveals how men can unearth their pain, heal themselves, restore relationships, and break the legacy of abuse. He mixes penetrating analysis with compelling tales of his patients and even his own experiences with depression as the son of a violent, depressed father and the father of two young sons.

Breaking the Cycle

Breaking the Cycle PDF Author: Zane
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 9781439186701
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 240

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Book Description
An eagerly awaited collection of stories dealing with domestic abuse, edited by the New York Times bestselling author Zane. Breaking the Cycle is a stunning and moving anthology of stories, each of which focuses on an aspect of domestic abuse. This powerful collection is sure to serve as a wake-up call for people either dealing with a domestic abuse situation, or those watching someone else endure it. In the title story, Zane describes the turmoil that a young girl suffers at the hands of her stepfather. The girl and her mother plan their escape, but at the last minute the mother falters. In D.V. Bernard's "The Lonely Echoes of My Youth," readers are introduced to a young boy raising himself on the fringes of a drug-infested neigborhood. Nane Quartay's provocative story, "The Grindstone," describes a boy who witnesses a brutal murder which will have far-reaching effects on him and his family. Tracy Price-Thompson weaves a powerful tale in "The Stranger" when a woman constantly abused by her husband finds inner strength after a brutal attack. Collen Dixon's "The Break of Dawn" will keep readers deep in thought long after they finish reading her story about a young desperate mother terrifed that her own daughter will grow up and become victimized herself. Dywane D. Birch's "Victory Begins With Me" reflects how one woman has to struggle to get her life back to normal. Shonda Cheekes' "Silent Suffering" flips the script when a man finds himself abused by the female in his life. Newcomer J.L. Woodson's "God Does Answer Prayers" deals with a young boy fighting for his life in a hospital bed, put there by one of the people who is supposed to love him the most: a parent. These stories capture the dangerous realities of domestic abuse, while also pointing toward the steps that need to be taken to break the cycle that perpetuates it. It is sure to serve as a rallying cry for all those who desire victory over their own victimization, and a guide for understanding the complex undercurrents that make such patterns possible.

Breaking the Cycle

Breaking the Cycle PDF Author: James Richards
Publisher: MileStones International Publishers
ISBN: 9780924748882
Category : Body, Mind & Spirit
Languages : en
Pages : 184

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Book Description
Are you tired of repeating the same cycle? Do you feel like what you do is never good enough? Are negative feelings robbing your life of joy? Do you sometimes feel that you can't find the light at the end of the tunnel? Do you want to be in control and predict your own future? Are you ready for the roller coaster to end and the good life to begin? Millions of people have these same feelings. You are not alone. But you can end your repeated struggles and break out of destructive cycles. Put an end to the frustration and begin to live your dreams. Everyone wants to enjoy a good life-a life of peace and happiness void of chaos! However, the sense of lack drives us into our never-ending cycles...Two steps forward, one step back. Up and down, In and Out. Mountain peak to valley. Like a hamster in a wheel, it never ends! It's time to get off the wheel. This incredible book by Dr. Jim Richards will give you the tools to face life with new confidence. On each page, you will find new keys to personal empowerment. You will transform your self-worth. You will disconnect from the feelings of lack and inadequacy. Your life will become a constant process from good to great! Discover the life-changing secrets of personal empowerment that have brought transformation to millions of people around the world. Breaking the Cycle provides the keys. You can end your destructive patterns today!

Is Shame Necessary?

Is Shame Necessary? PDF Author: Jennifer Jacquet
Publisher: Vintage
ISBN: 0307950131
Category : Science
Languages : en
Pages : 226

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Book Description
An urgent, illuminating exploration of the social nature of shame and of how it might be used to promote large-scale political change and social reform. “[Jacquet] exposes the ways shame plays into collective ideas of punishment and reward, and the social mechanisms that dictate the ways we dictate our behavior.” —The Boston Globe Examining how we can retrofit the art of shaming for the age of social media, Jennifer Jacquet shows that we can challenge corporations and even governments to change policies and behaviors that are detrimental to the environment. Urgent and illuminating, Is Shame Necessary? offers an entirely new understanding of how shame, when applied in the right way and at the right time, has the capacity to keep us from failing our planet and, ultimately, from failing ourselves.

Breaking Free from Body Shame

Breaking Free from Body Shame PDF Author: Jess Connolly
Publisher: Zondervan
ISBN: 0310352509
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 240

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Book Description
You were made for more than a love/hate relationship with your body. It's one thing to know in your head that you were created in the image of God. Yet it's quite another to experience this belief in your body, against the cultural ideals of a woman's worth. And between the two lies a world of frustration, disappointment, and the shame of somehow feeling both too much and never enough in your body. Jess Connolly is a bestselling author, sought-after speaker, and trusted Bible teacher who knows this inner conflict all too well, and this book details her journey--and yours--of setting out to discover how to break free from the broken beliefs we all hold about our bodies that hold us back from our fullest life. The truest thing about you is that you are made and loved by God. And the truest thing about Him is that He cannot make bad things. This book will help you believe it with your whole self, as Jess guides you through an eye-opening, empowering process of: Renaming what the world has labeled as less-than Resting in God's workmanship Experiencing restoration where there has been injury And becoming a change agent in partnering with God to bring revival to a generation of women Far from a superficial issue, self-image is a spiritual issue, because God has named your body good from the beginning. Whether your struggle is with eating and exercise habits, stress or trauma, infertility or injury, this book makes space for you to experience God meeting you in this tender place, and ring His freedom bell over your body in a whole new way.

Shame Off You

Shame Off You PDF Author: Denise Pass
Publisher: Abingdon Press
ISBN: 1501869698
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 246

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Book Description
“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” — Romans 8:1 Shame is an assault on the core of who we are. It assassinates our character, minimizes our worth, and dashes our hope. Like Adam and Eve, we often hide shame, but hiding never heals it. Left unattended, shame can develop into a crippling reality that paralyzes us. Like an infectious disease, shame impacts everyone . . . but not all shame is bad. Shame can either be an oppressive and powerful tool of worldly condemnation or a source of conviction that God uses to bring his people back to himself. Having the discernment to know the difference and recognize shame in its many forms can change the course of one’s life. In a transparently honest style, Pass shares of her experience dealing with shame after learning that her former husband was a sexual offender. Having lived through the aftermath, she leads you into God’s Word where you will see for yourself that God is bigger than your pain, shame, mistakes, and limitations. Shame Off You shares how freedom can be found in choosing to break the cycle of shame by learning from the past, developing healthy thinking patterns, silencing lies, and overcoming the traps of vanity and other people's opinions.