The Borowitz Report

The Borowitz Report PDF Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1439129495
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 116

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Book Description
Prepare to be shocked. From the man The Wall Street Journal hailed as a "Swiftean satirist" comes the most shocking book ever written! The Borowitz Report: The Big Book of Shockers, by award-winning fake journalist Andy Borowitz, contains page after page of "news stories" too hot, too controversial, too -- yes, shocking -- for the mainstream press to handle. Sample the groundbreaking reporting from the news organization whose motto is "Give us thirty minutes -- we'll waste it."

The Borowitz Report

The Borowitz Report PDF Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1439129495
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 116

Get Book

Book Description
Prepare to be shocked. From the man The Wall Street Journal hailed as a "Swiftean satirist" comes the most shocking book ever written! The Borowitz Report: The Big Book of Shockers, by award-winning fake journalist Andy Borowitz, contains page after page of "news stories" too hot, too controversial, too -- yes, shocking -- for the mainstream press to handle. Sample the groundbreaking reporting from the news organization whose motto is "Give us thirty minutes -- we'll waste it."

The Trillionaire Next Door

The Trillionaire Next Door PDF Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: HarperBusiness
ISBN: 9780066620763
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 112

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Book Description
When Getting Rich Quick Just Isn't Fast Enough!Many day trading books on the market today contain dubious advice, but never before has there been a book guaranteed to contain 100 percent dubious advice--until now. The Trillionaire Next Door is that book. Inside you'll find: The rock-solid, scientific principles of day trading explained in language so clear and concise it's almost insulting A glossary of key economic terms for the day trader, like "mousepad" and "click" Advice for the long-term investor: which stocks to hold in your portfolio for five, ten, fifteen minutes or more Confusing, meaningless graphs and charts Bad math And much, much more--but since day traders have short attention spans, not too much more "If The Trillionaire Next Door were a stock, I'd buy it, sell it, buy it, sell it, and buy it again--it's that good!" --Stacy Gellman, day trader

The Jewish Moral Virtues

The Jewish Moral Virtues PDF Author: Eugene B. Borowitz
Publisher: Jewish Publication Society
ISBN: 9780827606647
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 396

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Book Description
The Jewish Moral Virtues is a book of musar - practical ethical wisdom applied to contemporary life. In form and purpose, it is parallel to William Bennett's bestselling Book of Virtues. Authors Borowitz and Schwartz synthesize traditional scholarship from a wide range of Jewish sources with personal insights into modern ethical dilemmas. Traditionally, Jewish ethical teachers have been concerned with law or general guidance for a good life, i.e., virtue, rather than philosophical meditations upon specific issues. This collection is structured upon the twenty-four virtues selected by a thirteenth-century Roman Jew, Yehiel ben Yekutiel, including trustworthiness, lovingkindness, compassion, generosity, charity, humility, and pure-heartedness, among others, and expands to include wisdom from the ancient rabbis, medieval philosophers, and Yehiel's successors over the past seven centuries.

Governor Arnold

Governor Arnold PDF Author: Andy Borowitz
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0743262662
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 124

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Book Description
THE TERMINATOR'S TERM, TOTALLY RECALLED! The real story of Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger's first one hundred days in office comes to life in vivid two-color photographs and completely fictitious captions. Governor Arnold tells the story of Schwarzenegger's historic first days in office, in pictures that are evocative, dramatic, and sometimes truly frightening -- especially the ones in which he is wearing no shirt. New Yorker humorist Andy Borowitz, creator of the award-winning website BorowitzReport.com, travels to Sacramento for an up-close, exclusive look at a man with a mission: to reshape California in his own monstrous, bulging-veined image. It's a book for history buffs...about the buffest man in history! Governor Arnold is guaranteed to make the Governator stop groping women...and start groping for superlatives!

Fierce Pajamas

Fierce Pajamas PDF Author: David Remnick
Publisher: Modern Library
ISBN: 0375761276
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 527

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Book Description
When Harold Ross founded The New Yorker in 1925, he called it a “comic weekly.” And although it has become much more than that, it has remained true in its irreverent heart to the founder’s description, publishing the most illustrious literary humorists in the modern era—among them Robert Benchley, Dorothy Parker, Groucho Marx, James Thurber, S. J. Perelman, Mike Nichols, Woody Allen, Calvin Trillin, Garrison Keillor, Ian Frazier, Roy Blount, Jr., Steve Martin, and Christopher Buckley. Fierce Pajamas is a treasury of laughter from the magazine W. H. Auden called the “best comic magazine in existence.”

Renewing the Covenant

Renewing the Covenant PDF Author: Eugene B. Borowitz
Publisher: Jewish Publication Society
ISBN: 0827606273
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 338

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Book Description
Borowitz creatively explores his theory of Covenant, linking self to folk and God through the contemporary idiom of relationship.

Terrorism for Self-glorification

Terrorism for Self-glorification PDF Author: Albert Borowitz
Publisher: Kent State University Press
ISBN: 9780873388184
Category : Political Science
Languages : en
Pages : 220

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Book Description
In this timely study of the roots of terrorism, author Albert Borowitz deftly assesses the phenomenon of violent crime motivated by a craving for notoriety or self-glorification. He traces this particular brand of terrorism back to 356 BCE and the destruction of the Temple of Artemis at Ephesus by arsonist Herostratos and then examines similar crimes through history to the present time, detailing many examples of what the author calls the Herostratos Syndrome, such as the attempted explosion of the Greenwich Observatory in 1894, the Taliban's destruction of the giant Buddhas in Afghanistan, the assassination of John Lennon, the Unabomber strikes, and the attacks on the World Trade Center buildings. terrorism cannot be the exclusive focus of a single field of scholarship, Borowitz presents this complex subject using sources based in religion, philosophy, history, Greek mythology, and world literature, including works of Chaucer, Cervantes, Mark Twain, and Jean-Paul Sartre. Terrorism for Self-Glorification, written in clear and direct prose, is original, thorough, and thought provoking. Scholars, specialists, and general readers will find their understanding of terrorism greatly enhanced by this book.

Holy Headshot!

Holy Headshot! PDF Author: Patrick Borelli
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1439123160
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 240

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Book Description
Holy Headshot! is an amazing collection of the funniest, strangest, most captivating performers' headshots and resumes you have ever seen. The book throws open the door to the casting director's office and gives an entertaining peek into the amazing -- and sometimes bizarre -- world of show business. Authors Patrick Borelli and Douglas Gorenstein pored over 50,000 headshots to put together this remarkable gallery, which showcases everyone from aspiring amateurs who are striving to live out their Hollywood dreams to seasoned professionals that you might recognize from the big screen. A celebration of our national obsession with getting famous, Holy Headshot! offers up plenty of "What were they thinking!?" hilarity, but just as often you'll find yourself rooting for the characters that populate its pages.

What's So Funny?

What's So Funny? PDF Author: David Sipress
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0358658667
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 298

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Book Description
From a longtime New Yorker staff cartoonist, an evocative family memoir, a love letter to New York City, and a delightful exploration of the origins of creativity—richly interleaved with the author’s witty, beloved cartoons A wry and brilliantly observed portrait of the budding young cartoonist and his Upper West Side Jewish family in the age of JFK and Sputnik. Sipress, a dreamer and obsessive drawer, goes hazy when it comes to the ceaselessly imparted lessons-on-life from his father, the meticulous, upwardly mobile proprietor of Revere Jewelers, and in the face of the angsty expectations of his migraine-prone mother. With self-deprecation, wit, and artistry, Sipress paints his hapless place in his indelibly dysfunctional family, from the time he was tricked by his unreliable older sister into rocketing his pet turtle out his twelfth-floor bedroom window, to the moment he walks away from a Harvard PhD program in Russian history to begin his journey as a professional cartoonist. In What’s So Funny?—reminiscent of the masterly, humane recall of Roger Angell and the brainy humor of Roz Chast—Sipress's cartoons appear with spot-on precision, inducing delightful Aha moments in answer to the perennial question aimed at cartoonists: Where do you get your ideas?

Family and Other Catastrophes

Family and Other Catastrophes PDF Author: Alexandra Borowitz
Publisher: MIRA
ISBN: 1488020337
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 400

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Book Description
“A zany, heartfelt, and laugh-out-loud funny debut.”—HelloGiggles Emily Glass knows she’s neurotic. But she’s got it under control. Sort of. Thankfully, she also has David, the man she’ll soon call husband—assuming they can survive wedding week with her wildly dysfunctional family. Emily’s therapist mother, Marla, who’s been diagnosing her children since they were in diapers, sees their homecoming as the perfect opportunity for long-overdue family therapy sessions. Less enthused are Emily and her two siblings: ardently feminist older sister, Lauren, and recently divorced brother, Jason. As the week comes to a tumultuous head, Emily wants nothing more than to get married and get as far away from her crazy relatives as possible. But that’s easier said than done when Marla’s meddling breathes new life into old secrets. After all, the ties that bind family together may bend, but they aren’t so easily broken.